Making Progress in Prayer
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One
Prayer at “your initiative”
There’s no good thing you can do without God’s help. In fact, whenever you do something good, God is actually the one who first takes the initiative, by providing the grace for you to have a good idea, make a good resolution, and have the willpower to carry it out. But it usually feels like we’re the ones taking the initiative and doing all the work. And that’s definitely true of prayer, especially at the early stages of the spiritual life.
I want to help you take the next right step in prayer this Lent. So, what are the main kinds of prayer that we have to work at?
The first kind of prayer is called “Vocal Prayer”. Vocal Prayer is speaking to God silently or out loud.
Examples of vocal prayer are the Our Father, Hail Mary, Glory Be, Prayers of the Mass, the Liturgy of Hours, Divine Mercy Chaplet, or simply speaking to God from the heart. The Catechism reminds us that, “Vocal prayer is an essential element of the Christian life” (2701) because talking, communicating, is always essential to a relationship.
What is the danger of this type of prayer? It can become mechanical, just saying the words without thinking of the person we are speaking to. Teresa of Avila insists that vocal prayer doesn’t count as prayer if you are not trying to pay attention to God with whom you are speaking. A relationship involves both talking and listening. People often say, “God never speaks to me.”
The question is: Do we ever stop talking and listen? Jesus said to St Faustina, “Oh if souls would only want to listen to My voice when I am speaking in the depths of their hearts they would reach the peak of holiness in a short time.” Diary 584
Two
Meditation or Mental prayer is where we really begin to listen to God.
Mental prayer or as Teresa and John call it, discursive meditation, is to turn your attention to God and think about what He has said or done: To understand what God has said or done, to love God for this truth, and to apply this truth to your life. Form a resolution based on this truth that we will put into practice.
John of the Cross (Ascent 2, 14, 2) says, “The purpose of discursive meditation on divine subjects is the acquisition of knowledge and love of God. Through many particular acts - this loving knowledge of God reaches the point at which a habit is formed in the soul.”
The Catechism (2708) suggests two forms of meditation: the Rosary and Lectio Divina – praying through Scripture.
At the beginning of Lent, I suggested that if you pray the Rosary occasionally, consider praying the Rosary every day during Lent. And if you pray the Rosary every day, then consider spending a little more time in friendship with Jesus each day this Lent through Lectio Divina.
Mental prayer is really simple.
Read something from Scripture, or the Saints or the Church. As soon as something strikes you – stop reading.
Reflect or think about what struck you. Try to understand what God is saying. Then apply that truth to your life by asking: Am I living this or not? If not, then what is preventing me? And what am I going to do about this? That leads to a resolution.
A Resolution is to choose something practical and concrete to do that day based on your meditation.
The resolution is the key to mental prayer. If we have a resolution we put into practice flowing from our mediation every day we will change and become better people. If we don’t practice a resolution, then we won’t stay the same, we will get worse because unchecked vice leads down not up.
Three
If you already pray the Rosary daily and practice Lectio, then maybe God is calling you to a deeper level of prayer.
John of the Cross teaches us that as our friendship with Jesus deepens our prayer should become more simple. It simplifies from saying a lot of words doing a lot of thinking and trying to figure things out to a simple loving attention (John of the Cross Ascent, 2, 14, 2-3)
John of the Cross describes this as, “An inclination to remain alone and in quietude…If those in whom this occurs, know how to remain quiet they will soon - in that unconcern and idleness -delicately experience the interior nourishment.”
Teresa of Avila tells us to continue mental prayer until we lose the desire to read and acquire more knowledge (Life 14). Then we should just be with God in calm, quiet, and stillness. (Life 12:2,5)
So, if you have established the habit of daily meditation and have persevered in this for some time but you find that you have lost the desire to say a whole lot or read a whole lot or even try to figure things out, if you have a growing desire to just be with Jesus and Mary without talking, reading and figuring things out, then do that. Simply remain alone with God in silence and commit to do more of that this Lent. Because Jesus is inviting you to a more intimate friendship with him and you want to respond.
Four
Distraction in Prayer
The habitual difficulty in prayer is distraction.
The Catechism tells us that our distractions in prayer reveal to us what we are attached to in a disordered way.
It’s not surprising that what distracts us in prayer is also what wakes us at 3:00 AM. Not universally but usually, men are distracted by work and women by the needs and cares of their kids and grandkids.
We are distracted by the things we worry about. We worry about them because we care but more truthfully, we worry about them because we have based our identity or self-worth on this thing. That is pride.
The Catechism continues with, “This humble awareness before the Lord should awaken our preferential love for him and lead us resolutely to offer him our heart to be purified. Therein lies the battle, the choice of which master to serve.”
Then the Catechism gives really solid advice, “To set about hunting down distractions would be to fall into their trap, when all that is necessary is to turn back to God.”
When you recognize you are distracted, simply give that thing to God and tell Him, “Lord, I can’t solve, fix, or control this thing, you can, so I’ll let you give it a try.” Just surrender it to him and turn your attention back to your mediation.
Five
Objections to Prayer
We all think we are too busy to pray.
The Catechism says, “We have not been commanded to work, to keep watch and to fast constantly, but it has been laid down that we are to pray without ceasing.” Evagrius cf. 1 Thess. 5:17 (2742)
No one ever died of hunger because of not having enough time to eat. The problem is not a lack of time. The problem lies in the wrong priorities. One always makes time for what is important.
What would my wife think if I was always too busy to give her my undivided attention in friendship and conversation? That she is not important?
Mother Teresa. “I have so much to do that I cannot afford not to pray.”
But people say, “I talk to God all day. Why do I need a specific time?” Again, I do things for my wife Sandy all-day. I text her and call her and talk to her throughout the day. But if I never stop and give her my full attention: What am I communicating to her? That she is not as important as those other things.
The Catechism (2697), “But we cannot pray at all times if we do not pray at specific times, consciously willing it.”
Maybe we don’t pray because we can’t see the productive results. I go to work and I see results. I try to pray and I don’t feel like I have accomplished anything, I feel like I am just wasting time.
We overly prize production and profit, thus prayer and being unproductive are useless.
What if I said to my wife, “I feel like time with you is unproductive, useless.” Prayer is time with the One we love because God is worth it. If we are looking for results then we are doing it for selfish reasons, not for the love of Him.