I Need Patience!
one
In the Sermon on the Mount Jesus said: “You have heard it was said…You must not kill…But I say this to you: anyone who is angry with his brother will be liable to judgment.”
Today we are going to reflect on impatience, but we must begin by making something clear: Not all anger is sinful. Anger is the God given passion, emotion, energy and power that should help us
1. Achieve something difficult or arduous – it’s the energy to push through when you want to quit.
2. Anger also gives us the power to Change what is bad or evil
3. And it helps us Endure without becoming evil or despairing
4. The power of anger is the power of resistance in the soul. (1,81,2)
Anger is a source of energy. Anger is like turning on a gas fire on a stove. If turned up too high or for too long it burns everything. If it is never turned on, then nothing cooks. Anger, like fire is a neutral gift. It is good, if it is controlled, and bad if it rages out of control. We control anger by meekness. Remember this: you are in control of your emotions; your emotions are not in control of you. When anger or any emotion rises, practice checking and commanding them to serve you, not control you. You can turn the fire up or down.
two
The emotion of anger helps us endure without giving up or giving in. This power to endure cheerfully is called patience. But in so many parts of our life we just want to be done. Done with this this chronic suffering, this project, this job, this responsibility, or this relationship. Whatever it is, we just want it to be done. But in the end, would we rather that it was done right, but we get impatient. Impatience is a form of sinful anger.
One of the most difficult things I have ever done was write the dissertation for my doctorate in Mariology. I used to hate writing. God blessed me, and I say truly blessed me with Fr. Johan Roten, the theologian who oversaw my dissertation. He was unmovable in his insistence that we leave no stone unturned and that every word, every sentence was done right. I just wanted to be done. So I would work hard enough to just get it done and submit my writing to him. He would come back and say “Its not right.” And make me do it again and again until it was done right. I hated him, feared him and just wanted to be done not only with the dissertation but even more with. Now that it is all over. I love the man and I miss him very much because He wouldn’t let me escape the pain and he pushed me to do what I never thought was possible through his insistence to persevere, to not quit before it is done right.
We all have something better than Fr. Roten, we have God who in His providence is guiding all things in our life for our growth. What are you struggling with right now that you just want to be done? Is there a chance God is trying to teaching you something there and He just wont let you escape?
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God is way more patient than we are because He wants us to be done right.
Notice I did not say God wants it done right. He wants us to be done right. God’s goal for each one of us is that we grow to share in his divine life more and grow in the virtues: humility, faith, hope, love, prudence, justice, fortitude, temperance, fidelity, honesty, and so forth.
If we need to overcome fear to grow in courage, then God in His providence allows us to experience fearful things so that we practice courage. If we need to grow in love, God allows us to experience people in need so that we give generously to them and grow in love. Whatever virtue we lack, God guides things, allowing something to enter our life that calls for that virtue.
It could be a difficult relationship, a difficult project or job or a chronic illness, whatever it may be, God is more concerned that you are done right – meaning that we gain the virtue we need through the experience. God wants us to grow in virtue more than He wants us to just be done with the painful or difficult experience. That is why God is way more patient than we are because he wants us to be done right.
If you are in the middle of something you just want to be done with – remember – God is doing some work in you and He wants you to be done right. So what virtue is God trying to form in you?
four
Patience means more than just gritting our teeth and enduring.
If we endure but at the same time are complaining, losing our faith, not accepting the cross and offering it up. Then we are not growing in the virtue of patience. Patience is a special form of fortitude whereby we endure hardships cheerfully.
James 1: 2 Count it all joy, my brothers, when you meet various trials, for you know that your faith is only put to the test to make you patient, but patience too is to have its practical results so that you will become fully-developed, complete, with nothing missing.
We can be of joy and good cheer in difficulty or suffering if we keep in mind the good that God is doing in us and in others. Now you don’t have to like what your going through and it doesn’t have to feel good. But we can still make the choice to think and act with good cheer because we know that God works all things for good for those who love him.
five
We must practice patience to grow in it. We can practice patience by accepting the little annoyances of daily life with cheerfulness. Every life is accompanied with its own particular crosses, even if it is just to dull monotony of an ordinary life. If we do not learn to accept the inevitable inconveniences and small trials of daily life, such as cold and heat, pain and discomfort, small illnesses, aches and pains, contradictions and ingratitude, we will never make any progress in cultivating the virtue of courage which is necessary for all the other virtues.
A good resolution for today would be to accept cheerfully any small thing you don’t like that you can’t change for the love of God and conversion of sinners.